The Crapper

I often wonder what the f**k I'm doing at LSU Law School. It started first semester when I realized that to a large number of folks, I was an outsider they didn't care to meet because I dressed differently, didn't have long straight hair, and didn't wear pearl earrings. I'm sure my failure to join a sororiety didn't help matters either.

Then, during my second year, when I was serving as the secretary of the Black Law Students Association (BLSA), Jacob Gardner, our Student Body President (SBA), f'ed up and accidently cc'ed the BLSA Parlimentarian on an racially-offensive email entitled "Ghetto Spelling Bee." Gardner enjoyed the email, and must have assummed the intended/not accidental recipients, his compadres on the SBA board, would too, because he freely added two off-color comments to the message. First, he noted that his favorite word from the "Ghetto Spelling Bee" was #2, an ebonics rendering of the word dictate. According to the email, LeRoy remembers the word dictate by saying "my girlfriend says my dictate good." But, Gardner didn't stop there. Irritated because of a BLSA request that the SBA post the minutes of their meetings -- to both inform students, you know their constituents, of SBA's upcoming events, as well as to ensure that BLSA didn't schedule a conflicting program -- Gardner also suggested he should post the "Ghetto Spelling Bee" on the bulletin boards "BLSA keeps busting my ass about."

After we, the board of BLSA, expressed our feelings on the matter Gardner refused to apologize. The Chancellor wanted to amicably settle the ordeal, so he scheduled a meeting of all parties. BLSA hoped to work with Gardner and to seize this opportunity to begin much needed discourse on diversity around the Law Center. But rather than being conciliatory, Gardner launched personal attacks and defended his position as staunchly as he would if a billion dollar client were on the line. The best evidence offered as proof that his comments weren't intentionally offensive was none other than the old "my best friend is Indian" crock. The meeting was a disaster. Quickly it became clear to everyone in the room, except Gardner of course, that he was incapable of fairly representing a diverse student body.

At that night's SBA meeting, several non-BLSA students asked Gardner to apologize. He refused. After incessant badgering, Gardner relented some, and said he was sorry if BLSA's feelings were hurt. That's it.

Many students rallied around Mr. Gardner. They claimed BLSA was on a "witch hunt," and Ghetto Spelling Bee - a play on ebonics starring Leroy, an inner-city 20-year old 5th grader - wasn't about African American folks at all. Hard to believe huh? Check out Parochial Petition
for proof and other titilating comments.

So today, approximately a year after the "Ghetto Spelling Bee" incident, several students took offense, not to last year's incident, but to the poster (see pic above) I made for a Necessities Drive. The drive is sponsored by the Public Interest Law Society, and the goal is to collect toiletries for underprivileged folks. Toilet ----> toiletries. Get it? I know you do. Perhaps not as clever as I initially thought, but still, all you anal retentive freaks out there, well I think a trip to the crapper may help them loosen things up a bit.